Coping with Holiday Stress

The holidays tend to arrive with a lot of expectations. We’re supposed to tap into joy, the holiday spirit, creating magic for others in our life and more. But real life doesn’t pause just because the calendar says it’s time to be merry. The holidays often bring a very different set of emotions: stress, pressure, exhaustion, overstimulation, family tension, financial worries, disrupted routines, and old emotional triggers showing up uninvited.

If you’ve ever wondered why you feel overwhelmed when everyone else seems to be having a great time, you’re not alone. Coping with holiday stress is something almost everyone has to navigate, even if we don’t always talk about it openly.

The good news is that holiday stress isn’t your fault. It’s not a personal failure. It’s incredibly common and is something we can manage with intention, clarity, and a few supportive strategies. Below are practical ways to help you move through this holiday season with more steadiness and less emotional overwhelm.

Protect the Routines That Keep You Regulated

One of the most effective ways to cope with holiday stress is also one of the simplest: protect your routine and habits. The holidays tend to disrupt sleep, movement, eating patterns, work schedules and downtime. When those rhythms fall apart, stress levels usually rise.

You don’t have to stick to the absolute same routine as usual, but it does help to maintain small pockets of consistency. This will help your nervous system stay regulated.

A few habits worth keeping part of your routine may include:

• Keeping a consistent-ish sleep window

• Drinking enough water (seriously, it matters)

• Moving your body daily, even for 10 minutes

• Eating regular meals rather than skipping and crashing

• Limiting alcohol or substances that amplify anxiety

• Maintaining therapy sessions, whether in person or virtually

• Taking 5–10 minutes of screen-free quiet time each day

Think of these habits as holiday anchors that can help bring your stress level down when everything else ramps up.

When people feel emotionally stressed, it’s rarely because something is “wrong with them.” It’s often because the structures that help them cope have been pushed aside. Reintroducing even one supportive routine can make a noticeable difference.

Set Boundaries That Reduce Pressure Instead of Adding More

Boundaries are often the unsung heroes of coping with holiday stress. And they don’t have to be dramatic or confrontational. Boundaries are simply choices that protect your energy, time, and mental health.

Holiday stress often comes from an overload of expectations:
family traditions, travel, gift exchanges, social gatherings, financial obligations, work events, emotional labor, hosting duties, cultural pressure, and the myth that you’re supposed to “do it all with a smile.”

The truth? You’re allowed to decide what you participate in and what simply doesn’t work for you this year.

Some holiday-boundary examples include:

Time boundaries

Go for two hours instead of staying all day. Leave early. Arrive late. Split your time between families. Protect your evenings.

Social boundaries

Say no to gatherings that drain you. Choose the people who feel nourishing. Suggest alternatives when something doesn’t work.

Emotional boundaries

Not every conversation needs your engagement. You can politely disengage from political debates, intrusive questions, or family conflicts.

Energy boundaries

Give yourself permission to rest, even if others keep pushing for more plans.

Financial boundaries

Set spending limits. Recommend low-cost gift swaps. Suggest experiences instead of presents. Avoid debt for the sake of tradition.

Boundaries remove pressure, reduce resentment, and keep holiday stress from spiraling into burnout. And you don’t need a lengthy explanation. “That doesn’t work for me,” or “I won’t be able to make it, but thank you for understanding,” is enough.

Let Go of the “Perfect Holiday” Narrative

A surprising amount of holiday stress comes from invisible standards. We have expectations about how things should look or how we should feel. Social media, movies, and cultural norms paint a picture of effortless joy, cozy family unity, and aesthetically perfect gatherings.

Meanwhile, real life might look a lot more like complicated family dynamics, financial strain, feeling overstimulated, loneliness, and grief or sadness creeping in unexpectedly.

Coping with holiday stress often starts with letting yourself off the hook.

You don’t have to force cheerfulness.
You don’t have to host the perfect dinner.
You don’t have to find the perfect gifts.
You’re allowed to experience a mix of emotions, including joy, stress, nostalgia, irritation, gratitude, discomfort, and everything in between.

Letting go of the perfect-holiday myth opens the door to a more honest, grounded experience. It will help the holidays to feel less stressful because you’re not performing a role. 

Make Room for Your Feelings Without Judging Them

The holidays can stir up emotions you weren’t expecting. These emotions don’t mean the season is ruined. They simply mean you’re human with a real history, real relationships, and a real inner world.

Instead of suppressing those feelings, try noticing what’s coming up, practicing self-compassion instead of criticism, giving yourself permission to step away or take breaks and talking with someone you trust.

For people who have experienced loss, grief may rise to the surface but it doesn’t have to take over the entire season. Find ways to honor and include the memory of your loved ones who have passed on.

Stress decreases when we let ourselves feel rather than brace against every uncomfortable moment.

Build in Moments of Rest, Joy, and Connection

Holiday stress eases when people intentionally create small moments that refill their emotional tank. These don’t have to be big or time-consuming.

Some accessible ideas include:

• a short walk outside

• a cozy night in instead of another gathering

• listening to music that calms you

• cooking something comforting

• connecting with someone who “gets you”

• savoring small rituals that make the season feel meaningful

• taking a nap without guilt

• carving out a few minutes alone

Your nervous system needs rest and softness just as much as it needs celebration and connection. A little intentional care goes a long way in reducing stress.

Moving Through the Holidays With More Ease

Coping with holiday stress doesn’t require perfection. What it does require is your presence and attention. You have to make a conscious effort to decrease your holiday stress. When you protect your grounding routines, set boundaries that support your well-being, release unrealistic expectations, and give yourself permission to feel whatever arises, you create a season that feels more manageable and far less overwhelming.

The holidays don’t have to be dazzling to be meaningful. They just need to be yours, shaped in a way that honors your needs, your energy, and your emotional reality.